Daily Archives: April 19, 2012

queuing

i am not sure whether i should call having to wait in a line up a pet peeve or a form of torture. all i know is that there are few things in life that drive me as batty as having to line up – in any way, shape or form.

i accept no responsibility whatsoever for this personal failing – i squarely cast all blame for my lack of patience on dear dad – lovely man, but dad has not one patient bone in his entire body when it comes to line ups. so, i had no hope from day one, and my impatience is a genetic inheritance. [shrug of shoulders].

to dr phil myself, i completely understand why i hate waiting: it’s because there is no definite timeframe (“it will take forty-two minutes to get through airport security!” or “you will be stuck on the 401 for three hours and three minutes!” [tangent: another reason i love my dentist -> they are always on time!]). type a control freaks do not take open-ended timing well!

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so, without further ado, here are random thoughts on the queue:

murphy’s law: let’s say there are six checkouts open at zehrs. they all have several people lined up, waiting to pay. i’ll eyeball the shoppers and their carts and dive into the line that looks the shortest. invariably, the one i pick will turn out to be the slowest of the options.

a way back playback memory: when we were little, our family often went to the kitchener farmer’s market on saturday mornings. talk about crowds: boy, we’d all be packed like sardines in the aisles between the vendors, that’s how popular the market was on a weekend morning. one specific outing sticks in my mind – dad and i couldn’t take the slowpoke, shuffling pace being forced upon us by the masses of marketgoers, and just like in the video game frogger…

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…we sped ahead of the brother and my mom, darting left, squeezing right, jostling passersby, slamming forward. what did we prove? absolutely nothing. but it sure was satisfying to determine the pace.

illegal avoidance technique: if i am out walking and i get to a red light, i will look both ways – and look both ways again – and walk against the red light if there is no traffic approaching. however: this action never occurs at the intersection of caroline and erb, in my ‘hood. that corner is absolutely terrible when you do have the green light and right-of-way to walk!

queuing as it relates to concert tickets: i’ve never done the camp-out-overnight-in-a-lawnchair-to-get-tickets-for-U2 type-thing, and can’t say that i feel i’ve missed out on a great life experience. thanks to the internet, this form of capturing seats to an in-demand performance may be a thing of the past.

the coldest i have ever been in my life: the winter after little e was born (so, january 2007), sil ana got wind of a lululemon warehouse sale being held in downtown toronto. she organized a meet-up with herself, her two sisters, and me. we decided to go on the morning of opening day (mistake #1) in order to catch the best selection. well, if that thursday did not prove to be the coldest day in toronto of the whole winter – i think the HIGH temp was -22 degrees C. i bundled up well, but wore trail running shoes instead of boots (mistake #2). we got to the site of the sale only to find a lineup snaking around several city blocks. we joined in. about two hours later, we had not moved an inch. we decided to throw in the towel and head home. it is surprising that i still have living toes. i don’t think i have ever been so chilled to the bone – ever!! [we later found out that by saturday, there were no lineups at all, and you were able to simply walk in and shop]. i would have been forgiving of my state of popsicleness had i been able to score some lulu goods, eventually!

the only time i exhibit patience: if little e or cutie c are involved, suddenly i have all the time in the world.

do you tend to keep people waiting or are you habitually early? i follow the five minute guideline – a 3 pm rendezvous means a 2:55 pm arrival!